It's a map, of sorts, without all the messy lines.

Monday, April 25, 2011

You think it's over?

Ah yes, another Easter come and gone. I do like spending Easter with the family, but it wears me out. Still, it was fun.

The story is off to its first editor - my mother. No word from her yet, and believe you me I am anxiously awaiting it.

The problem is I feel like I can't work on anything yet. I don't want to fuss with the robot story quite yet because there's still a LOT of research to be done, and I hate to re-write because I was stupid the first time around. Which leaves me to moving on to the sequel for what I just wrote, but that too is problematic. What if I change something big in the next line of edits? If I write out an entire character, story arc, whatever? It troubles me. Of course, if I were following my own advice I'd be happily key-mashing away with a very "worry about it later" philosophy. Which, I guess, I could do - it's not like there's anything preventing me from doing that except my own stupid mental hang-ups.

I'm still stressing about marketing and self-publishing. It's very distracting. I have pretty much settled on self-publishing, but then there's the question of how to market, which outlet to go with, etc. I like Lulu a lot, but Createspace has the whole Amazon thing. But then Amazon can be kind of shady so . . . Urgh. I will thinking about it more when the time gets closer.

Anyway, on a totally unrelated-to-writing note, Thursday marks the beginning of the most holy of my annual pilgrimages - Rolex 3-day Event in Kentucky! I would like to announce that I will be blogging as much of Rolex as possible, come Hell or high water. I am driving down on Thursday, so I won't get to catch any of the action then, but Friday, Saturday and Sunday will all be spent totally at the event. We will also be doing our usual food tour of Lexington (ie: pigging out shamelessly) so I am thinking I might talk about that as well. Whatever - it should be good times for all! Very excited.

Now, if I can just survive this psych test I have at noon, we should all be peachy. :)

Thursday, April 14, 2011

My Week is Death

I lived! And I didn't even fail either of my exams or miss turning in my papers! Very exciting - definitely a highlight of my life. And by that I mean, I'm really happy that I managed it hahahaha.

Anyway the weather is beautiful here so I'm hanging out on the couch with the door open, enjoying the outside. I'm simultaneously watching Ghost Hunters, though, so it's not like I'm totally one with nature. Let's not get too outdoorsy.

Writing has been on hold for about a week; since I finished that book. Still have no working title aside from 'Beatrice' which is the name of the main character. Obviously that won't work long-term. I have kicked a few around, but so far nothing is working for me. I started reading back through; I totally axed the whole prologue and am working my way through chapter 1. I hate editing but I want to do it right, so I'm taking my time. I anticipate I'll be done in, oh, a month, two at the outside. I want to leave out some things; I already have a good idea of what's definitely going and what's staying. I also want to move some stuff up a little bit and flesh some things out more. The scope of the story takes place over such a long period of time - it's not something I'm used to doing, so that is a stretch for me, too.

Basically, the whole thing consists of things I'm not comfortable with, don't write about a lot, and need to work on LOL! Even if it takes me forever, though, I want to polish this up and get it out there. It'll make me better as a writer, anyway.

In the meanwhile, I started another book today. Robots, as I mentioned, and based on the short story I wrote in high school. It's WAY more inside my comfort zone - male lead, bumbling, hopeless romantic, mostly humorous content. Considering that, it should be much faster to get from beginning to end. Plus it takes place over very little time; international conspiracy bust, you know how it is. I mean, it is going to have to take some time, but the last one started in September and ends in April - seven months, one scientific accident culminating in super powers, a necromancer, a demon possession and zombies all crammed in to, oh, ideally 105,000 words. It's a lot. This next one will be much simpler, I've vowed.

The problem with Bea's story, of course, is that I'm setting her up to be a character that I can write more stories about. There's a lot of world-building to be done. Not that there isn't with the new one - it's 200 years in the future and there's a lot of technology - but it's much easier to write about technology changes than explain wizards, demons, angels, etc. Especially when you're not expecting to establish a solid canon.

With that said, I do need to worry less about that kind of thing and just make sure the story is well-told.

In non-writing news that is pretty mundane yet nevertheless exciting, I will be giving my two weeks notice at my job. I have another job lined up for the summer (hopefully) and I'd rather not be obligated to work during finals week. It's sad, because . . . Okay, it's not that sad, because I never really liked doing the job itself, mostly just the talking to people part, BUT NEVERTHELESS. I will miss the paycheck. Oh well, we're all starving college students at one point or another. Chalk it up to life experience.

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Procrastinate, moi? AHAHAHA, oh, well . . . yes, actually.

So I have this thing about writing. I need music.

I don't really remember when I started really trying my writing consistently to music, but it became almost an addiction recently when I did a fun exercise with some fanfiction I was working on: I wrote a collection of pieces, each directly inspired by a song that I pulled up on my iTunes. Initially, this was supposed to be a random thing - I wasn't supposed to pick the songs - and the pieces were to be wholly written during the period of the song.

By the end of this "experiment" (which ended up going on for fifty songs in the original "short-work" form, and then culminating in a separate novella-length fanfiction in which each chapter had its own song) I realized that I absolutely write better with music that is selected appropriately for each scene.

It's because of this that all my stories have soundtracks now.

The one I just finished - and goddamn, do I need to come up with a working title or what? - works with a lot of concepts that are interesting to me: life after death, applying physics beyond our understanding with the result being "magic", the supernatural, and just plain old vanilla friendship. And the one song that really embodies the whole story, for me, and that I've listened to more times through the course of this monstrosity, is 'Something to Believe In' by Parachute.

And it's weird, listening to that song now that it's all finished. Not because the story is done, or maybe that is why. But when I listen to that song and read at the same time, everything is so damn vivid. I can see the scenery, the green of the swamp, I can see the characters. It's all flashes - almost like a music video - but it's kind of crazy.

Moreover, it kills me that no matter how hard I try, I will never ever be able to paint that picture for my readers. Not without exhausting the world's supply of adjectives. Not without shooting a movie straight out of my head. I'll try my damnedest, but I know that ultimately, it's impossible. But hopefully, when I fail it's not because I haven't done a good job. Hopefully it's because the readers are forming their own pictures, and I've given them enough material to do that. Take, oh, take Terry Pratchett for example. When I read a Pratchett book for the first time, it's a book - words on a page. I don't see the characters, I don't hear their voices. But then when I read it again, or when I sit and think about a scene, all of a sudden it's real. He didn't have to totally describe every single detail, because it would have been wasted the first time around and would make the whole thing too cumbersome to read. He just had to write enough that when I slow down and think about it, there's the picture, there's the character, there's the action, there it all is. And I really want to be able to do that.

Music helps, but not every reader is going to have the same picture as me, or the same soundtrack. When I was writing at first, I considered naming each chapter after the main song for it - the book woudl come ready-made with a soundtrack - but then I realized that the only person that would help would be me. For readers it would be confusing at best, and stifling at worst. Not everyone likes music when they read, anyway, and I can't imagine a lot of people willing to admit that they enjoy listening to 'Safety Dance' as many times as I did (I CAN LEAVE MY FRIENDS BEHIND).

But I'm going to keep listening, because maybe - just maybe - that'll help me pull it all together all the better.

In other news: I have thought more about writing in the past few days than I think I ever have in my life. Goddamn.

And no, this is no way is not procrastinating the work I need to be doing . . . Oh, wait. Dammit.

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Le ugh

I really hate school. Gets in the way of all the stuff I'd rather do . . . Psht, studying, whatever. Anyway, here's a goal list for this weekend/next week:

  • Today: start my paper for maternity before embarking on my Epic Evening of Epicness. If home early enough, work on studying Nurs372.
  • Sunday: Finish paper if necessary, study for Nurs372 and Nurs352. Prepare for Sim4 Monday morning
  • Monday: Study for Nurs372 predominantly, also work on 352.
  • Tuesday: Study for Nurs352
  • Wednesday: Die.
Totally feasible, am I right? Honestly the maternity paper wouldn't be so bad if it didn't have to be in APA format and use references and etc. As it is, it's the formatting that totally kills me. Urgh.

So I didn't do any writing at all yesterday. I actually wanted to, but I had another paper - this one for Psych - that I had to work on instead. I have also been thinking a lot about publishing. I know it's early for that, but I'm enjoying the research of it, if I'm honest. The more articles I read by various authors in my genre, the more I'm convinced self-publishing is the way to go. Like I said, though, it's a long way off so I'm still deciding. If I do decide to self-publish then we get into questions about which website (CreateSpace beating out Lulu at the moment because of the Kindle accessibility, but please contribute if you're knowledgeable on the subject), whether to get my own ISBN, whether I should start my own publishing company for my work (I'm leaning toward yes), how to market, etc. It's all a little overwhelming but I figure I'm at least a year away from wanting to do anything of that nature, so I have time to think about it. No rush, right?

Anyway, I was thinking about what to write next, too. As much as I'd love to work on the sequel to what I just wrote, it's not like I'm on a time table, and honestly I think it'd be good if I take a step back from that one and edit it first. It'll give me some time to thinking about elements of the world that I am not necessarily happy about, and really solidify what I'm trying to accomplish in that book. So in that vein I started thinking about what else I could possibly work on.

It occurred to me that when I was in High School I wrote a short story that I liked quite a lot, and had wanted to work on more. So I dug the thing out and re-read it. It's clumsy and not as well-written as I'd like now (of course, this is seven years later, too lol) but it was pretty good, and it has a really interesting premise. So I might work on that next. Basically, it's about the government and robot assassins. But not like Terminator, I'm talking people who are hired to assassinate robots.

And who doesn't love robots? I sure do. That blurry line between human and machine that we're getting closer to every year is always interesting, so I'd love to explore the possible future of AI a little more.

So yeah, that's my plan. Work on that piece while I clean up the one I just finished and get that squared away to the point I'm happy with it. And as far as that plan goes, it's still up in the air, but the general strategy is:

  • I edit the ever-loving crap out of it and re-format it until I'm vaguely happy with it.
  • I give it to my copy-editor (aka my mother, God love that woman - she puts up with me)
  • I make changes on her suggestions, work it out a little more, figure out more of what I'm looking for. Hopefully at this point I'm fairly happy with what's going on in the book.
  • I give the book to a few friends who are interested in editing for me. I'd like them to read for both spelling/grammar/that jazz, as well as flow and content. Hopefully after I make these changes, I'm pretty close to the final piece.
  • I give the final project to people who genuinely want to read it - maybe about five people. Get their feedback and hopefully don't need to make any more major changes.
  • Publish.
It's a logical progression, imho. What I'm most nervous about is flow and content - what if it's not exciting? What if it's interesting? What if it's confusing? That's why I'm looking forward to reading it again; I thought it satisfied all those criteria when I was writing it, but by giving it time to breathe like a nice Merlot and then coming back to it, I might see something I didn't at first.

Also, it occurred to me the other day that this pretty much has become a writing blog. Does anyone have any problems with that? Ah, who am I kidding, no one's even reading it. :P Yay rambling for my own sake! Whatevs, helps me gets my thoughts straight! :D

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Endings and beginnings

So it's over. At 5:12 tonight, I typed the words 'LE END' and sat back and took a breath.

I did it. It's all done. My little babies have had their story told to the world, or rather, to me, and I have faithfully documented it for them.

It would be lying if I said I didn't cry at any point in writing this. I cried near the end. Not at the end. Because why cry now? I'm so not done. There's so much to do still! I have sworn to myself that I will not cry until I have the published copy in my hands, and I'm looking at the cover with my name and my title and it's my book. Then I can sob like an infant. Probably over typos.

And then, obviously, when I'm famous I'll sell the tear-stained atrocity for big bucks on Ebay.

But anyway, YES! I did it and I wrote a book! I feel so strong.

Never mind that this is what I feel like the whole thing looks like.

Harsh, you say? Certainly it can't be that bad! A cat eating a plate of spaghetti? It's a mess, it's so bad it's fascinating, it's almost modern art.

Maybe if I call it performance art I won't have to edit it.

And now I'm in a lurch. Obviously step 2 here is to edit the thing. But how? Slice and dice? Or meticulously re-read, re-format and dissect out the unnecessary? Inject in what it lacks?   I don't know - I've never done this before! Any authors reading this, please, don't hesitate to share your opinions. I'm kind of at a loss.

I'm also confused about what to do during class time now. Classes have always been my designated writing time (I'm such an incredible student, good Lord) - now what do I do? Pay attention? Blow that!

So I'll probably just write a sequel. I'm thinking I'll be ready by next Monday to pick up work on something else, unless my exams next week are stressing me out too much. Then I might just study.

Either way, the sequel is happening. I love Bea. She gave me fits when I started writing; I couldn't get my head around the character, I couldn't judge her reactions, I couldn't think from her point of view. She was a tough cookie to crack. But now that she has, well, she's kind of special.

Also the zombie. I do love him. He's just so damn adorable. If they ever make a movie, he'll be played by Michael Cera in heavy makeup.

Anyway, I'll conclude with a quote from an old, old story. A fanfiction, actually, that I wrote for Terry Pratchett's Discworld a few years ago. It's not profound or even directly related to what I just finished, but I think it accurately summarizes what I'm facing when I talk about editing over here.

"Wait, are you Lord Vetinari? The ghost of Lord Vetinari? Why are you in my house?"

"It's an unnecessarily long and convoluted story. Most of it's flowery language to fluff up the word count. Now give me your laptop."

"No!"

"Why not?"

"Because it's mine."

"That's an appalling reason for anything."

Friday, April 1, 2011

Spring break

All in all, a success.

Except for the Head Cold of Doom that left me a hacking, wheezing, mucous-y mess for the whole week. Yes, yes, delightful, I know.

But take heart! My book is nearly finished! I always feel awkward this close to the end - I'm never sure I want to actually finish it, because I'm never convinced it'll be any good when I'm done. And truthfully they never are, really.

But, as is my mantra, that is what editing is for.

In a way, this blog has kept me accountable. I can see where I'm struggling, I can see that I've had these issues before. And I've just written straight through them because otherwise nothing would ever get done. Every author has these problems - they have to. I tell myself this because it makes me feel better.

I look at writers like Terry Pratchett, who turned out two books a year at the peak of his career (at least as far as production goes, I'm not talking about quality at the moment), and I think "were you doing cocaine?" I mean, seriously, you'd almost have to be. But then I look at other authors that are equally brilliant, like Christopher Moore and Neil Gaiman, and their output is more what I would consider a reasonable pace. It's hard to throw Neil in there though, because he does so much besides just writing books. TV shows, comics, short stories . . . The man keeps busy, is what I'm saying.

And don't get me started on authors that turn out more than two a year. Ghost writers. They have to have them. I can't even imagine that they don't. If they don't, well . . . Cocaine. All I'm saying. I'm looking at you, Stephen King.

Anywho, the whole kit and kaboodle is rolling in to the climax at the moment, at a scanty 260 pages and 110k words. I'm calling 115-120k before it's done, which is about 10-20k over what I want to be looking at. Ah well. I already know there are things I'm going to axe, and I'm sure I'll find more. Then again, there'll be things I want to add, too. So we'll just have to see.

A question for readers: when you read books, do you want to see what the villain is doing? Reason I ask is the villain is featured in this book, mostly because I kind of like him a little too much. So while the majority of the book focuses on the main characters - the "good guys", if you will - we do get little glimpses of the other side of things. I'd be gutted to have to take all of that out, but if readers find it confusing or off-putting, well, that's more important than me wanting more of the bad guy. Obviously different authors handle it differently, and some might do it well so that it doesn't throw readers at all, but I'm just asking as a generality. Your Input Is Valuable.

So that's the state of things as they stand. I'm setting a tentative deadline for myself of next weekend - I should be able to wrap things up by then. Maybe by the end of this weekend, even. After all, realistically I'm only a couple days' worth of writing away. We'll just have to see; I do do other things with my life, after all.

Ah, who am I kidding? No I don't. Dee-lightful. Finish line, ho!